Controversial opinion time, but honestly, I don’t think this movie is going to be terrible. I don’t think it’s necessarily going to be good, but I’m also someone who saw the original Super Mario Bros. movie in the theaters, and has watched it since multiple times… both with RiffTrax and just by itself, willingly. I also watched the cartoon in the 80s that featured Captain Lou Albino, Captain N the Game Master*, and plenty of other Nintendo entertainment that’s been just gawd awful that this could just be Chris Pratt reading tax law and it’d still be better.
The audience for this is clearly kids, and that’s what I think is always important to keep in mind. Yeah, adults are going to rip it apart all the time, but much like Nintendo doing it’s thing, they’re not going going to listen anyway and never going to vary from their plan. That’s clear with how bad the current Pokemon games are and they’re just doing the same plot in them again for the 13th time.
I know I’ll be going to the theaters to see this, because my son absolutely loves Mario. His favorite game is Super Mario 3D World + Browser’s Fury, with Super Mario Odyssey coming in second. He dressed as Mario for halloween, owns a ton of Mario toys, and will likely start counting down the days. So despite how I and all the nerd sites feel about it, I have a feeling Nintendo and Illumination probably made something that will be “eh” with adults and critics but will be a hit with kids.
*I once dressed up as Kevin for Halloween myself… thankfully I don’t think any pictures survive of that terrible costume. Also, do not try to watch that show. It’s… just so, so bad.